So I’m sitting in the movie theatre watching “No Country for Old Men,” when I get this really weird feeling that I wrote the movie.
“This is so not the kind of thing I would write,” I tell my friend, “And yet I keep knowing what’s going to happen. If I didn’t write it, then I must be time travelling or something. Seriously, this is creeping me out to no end. Maybe I’m some kind of genius or something and it’s just coming out now. Like I can predict things or something.”
“Did you read the book?” she asked.
Turns out I did. Which explains everything.
Furthermore, here are my thoughts: First of all, Corman McCarthy is a scary person who I have a tiny crush on. I always get crushes on people who think of things I would never think of, like killing people with an oxygen machine and writing books with hardly any girls in them and winning Pulitzer Prizes. Second of all, I would not see that movie again as it was both boring and terrifying at the same time. And thirdly, I’d just like to say that I lost a total of 7 pounds so far on Jenny Craig.
But I digress. . .
Bottom line is that the movie will most likely win at least one award, in my opinion, if, and this is a big if, they dub in an entirely different voice for Tommy Lee Jones. You can’t hear him at all. The whole time everyone in the theatre kept saying, “ Wait, what?”
If they aren’t able to do that, I predict that it could easily still win Funniest Haircut On A Serial Killer, hands down.
Every time I think about it, I start laughing. Actually I would see it again, just for that. If you decide to go see it, tell me that wasn’t the best idea for a hairstyle. Some people really are geniuses.